2012 Newness

I've spent most of 2011 seeing more long term miracles than I've seen any other year. But I've also spent the last few months asking God for great things in 2012. Asking for him to raise my budget, asking him to speak to my heart, asking Him to double the amount of teams going out, asking Him to advance His kingdom, asking God to pour out... To double His anointing... To call the lukewarm church into walking with Passion, Power, Fire & Love. So keeping in line with that, I'm closing this blog and opening a new one. Fresh Fire, Fresh Blog. The Nations Await.

What do you want?

Shh, if you listen you will hear him clearly. But if you don't listen you will miss it in a passing moment. He speaks. He speaks boldly and lovingly because He is both bold and loving. God is speaking to me about so many things lately that I feel like I'm traveling between dinner tables trying to just get as much in as possible. What a great feeling! A scary disappointing feeling is when you can't hear him speaking to you. If that's ever you, I challenge you to just keep seeking Him every day and eventually the clouds will clear and the sun will break through to your skin.

One thing that I have been feeling lately is "I WANT MORE!" More of anything that God has to offer! I know it sounds petty but it's a deep desperate feeling, that has been making my heart tender toward the things of God. A couple of months ago, my pastor Shannon Wooten, looked at me and asked me "Katrina, what do you want?" Not in a what do you want for your ministry, or what do you want for lunch but a what are the deep longings of your heart that you've been suppressing for others or ministry kind of question. It's been so long since I really thought about what I want that I didn't even have an answer. A friend of mine a few weeks ago told me that I never take the business face off to get to the center of the tootsie pop, in other words, I don't laugh enough to show that I am truly enjoying the Lord and what I do! That's a reality check!

A great friend and mentor, Lena Shrader, was riding with me the first night of District Council this year and she made a comment (one that I liked) she said, "Katrina, you're such a wonderlust. You want to live extravagant adventures with Jesus to wherever and whenever; but, you also want the house with the family and the dog." That is such a true statement. That totally helped me to sync my thoughts of what I want. It's all true. I want it all! I want the sweet family with the PTA and the kid in the high chair with food smeared on the wall and the husband with eyes that steal your heart every single time. AND I want to truck through the rainforest and share Jesus with natives, travel to villages that have never heard and tell them of unfailing love! To go anywhere and everywhere for the cause of Christ regardless of what the television says. AND I want a fireplace in a great home slightly outside of a city and a glass room off the back for morning reading (of course this won't all come at once ;) ). AND I want to encourage folks across the US and World to share the gospel with young and old!

I've been at a huge inner turmoil that last four month because the enemy was trying to convince me that I have to give up one of the dreams. Either the heart of a missionary or the family. Either I would live without companionship and have the adventure of a lifetime needing new sneakers when I get into heaven because the rubber is burnt off OR I would have an amazing family who loves the Lord and makes a community impact for the kingdom. This last week, the Lord shared with me that I don't have to release either dream. That His future for me, involves both. But, He also shared with me that the life I've been living is good. Amen. Both the work side and the personal me side is good. These are His words to my heart, "I love you. The life you've been living is good. But, I have great in store for you. You decide. Do you want good or do you want great? You choose. But if you choose great. We need to make some adjustments."

This is a great word from the Lord! But it's also a scary word. Why? Because "good" is comfortable! Good is what I know. But I also know that the quest for "great" can be it's own amazing adventure! I want more. I want GREAT! All my chips are in chief, no ties, no binds, no nothing here I am Lord, I want what you want (and I really hope it involves a family with lots of adventures and sharing your son anywhere and everywhere!).

I want what you want.

You Can Support

I only have $1,000 a month left to raise to be able to return to the field full time. Please, today, consider joining my support team. Adopt me, as your missionary. Pray for me and give faithfully as the Lord enables you. Even the smallest contribution, given faithfully, WILL change the world. In the next couple of pages I have included a glimpse of what my ministry entails. If you have any questions please contact me.

The way support works is individuals pledge to give a certain amount... for example. $5 a month. There are several options on how to give...

There are several options on how to give, each are tax deductable and you will receive a tax receipt in the mail.

Option 1: Automatic Monthly Deduction

You can have your giving taken out automatically by filling out that section on the enclosed faith promise form.

Option 2: Online Giving

You can go to the website below and enter your information. If you aren’t viewing this document electronically, email me at katrinafrazee@gmail.com and I’ll email you the quick link.

Give Online By Clicking Here

Option 3: Send a Check

made out to “AG” and in the memo line put “Katrina Frazee 276199”. Mail the check monthly to AG, 1445 N Boonville Ave. Springfield, MO 65802

Think about the Myths... there are 2 main myths!

1) My $5, $10, $25 a month doesn't make a difference. YES IT DOES!!!! If everyone gave $5 faithfully each month, so many needs in the world would be met. Our humanitarian efforts and our evangelical efforts would be met if EVERYONE gave a little!

2) Is that if I don't do it, someone else will. NOT TRUE. You have a role to play in the kingdom no matter how big or how small. It's a role and it's your role, not anyone else's. Don't miss the opportunity to advance the heart of God in unreached places.

Halloween

Wikipedia describes Halloween as...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halloween

When we lived in Central Asia, it occurred to me that Halloween doesn't exist everywhere. Then I started to think, "what is Halloween?" My mind started roaming and combing through what is and what is not... When I look at Halloween, I see a bunch of people re-identifying themselves for a night. They select a costume whether they think it's "cool" or because it's some small piece of them that they desire to live out and on Halloween you can just "pretend" for a night and don't necessarily have to hold the stigma for the rest of your life (unless you do something stupid on that night, then your doomed).

This week, I've asked a multitude of kids what they are going to be for Halloween. A close friend's daughter has been something different every day this week whether it was "Pirate Kitty" or a princess with a sword (I like that!). Another little girl I asked at a tutoring night and she said "Tinker bell", I asked, "do you have wings?" and she said, "o yes." Wings make all the difference, who wouldn't want to fly. Other kids want to be super heroes or robots, or athletes.

On campus there has been a kid running around all week dressed as the grim reaper. Others on Halloween night will dress like witches, goblins, devils, and dark creatures. It's interesting on Halloween that you can usually find some sort of reflection of the heart represented in the costume selection. Whether it's dark, cute, beautiful, comical or anonymous... we never really know until the heart reaches the light to see what's really there.

If finances and shopping selections were of no consequence... what would you be on Halloween?

I want to be a "Ghostbuster!"

Are you threatened?

The Lord has been speaking to my heart a lot the last 6 months. He speaks more frequently and louder the more and deeper that we dive into His word and His heart. Many people may want to come along and lovingly shape you to be what they believe the Lord wants you to be. Most of them mean well and they love you. But really, nothing will change in the depth of who you are until you dig deep enough to hit the place in God's heart where He is the shaper and molder of your future, your heart and your character. People can't change people, God changes people... when we seek him... He transforms the heart. This is one of the sooooo many things that the Lord has been speaking to me about. I'm currently doing a bible study by Beth Moore called "David: 90 days with a heart like his."

A heart like his... a heart after God's own heart... Don't we all want that? Don't we all desire a pure heart, a loving heart, a heart that seeks after the depth of God. To live a repentant life rather than a prideful life... to be humbled but bold in our walks for Him. To be someone that others desire to be around... a reflection of Jesus? Someone deeply responsible, humbled and encompassed in the heart of God.

One of the messages in the devo stuck out to me drastically... Saul was threatened by David. Of course, we read the word and we know this but seriously... Saul... was.. threatened... by... David. I was stunted by this when I read it. There are moments in our walk when we lose sight of the goal and the end result and begin to look at the faults... or abilities of our brothers and sisters. But not just examining these faults or abilities but using others faults against them... or using others abilities as threats to your own identity or your abilities. Where if Saul wouldn't have been threatened by David or perhaps the praises David was receiving but coupled his abilities with David's they could have done an incredible kingdom work! Incredible!! But the enemy entered in through insecurities... unnecessary insecurities. And essentially... a person could begin to establish who they are in what they aren't... crazy right... stay with me.

For instance, (forgive me, I am just going to put this out there, I didn't ask for permission so I repent if it's inappropriate), I have a great friend and sister in Jesus named Lori. Lori is a stellar artsy person. All things artsy! From coffee shops, to looking at art, clothing, fashion and being able to see things that others can't see creatively, to desiring to create beautiful artistic works. She is MASS talented. I am not artsy or talented in the creative world (although I like to dabble in creative things here and there...and I've progressively gotten better, I'm not a connoisseur). I think a moment in my life became a little jealous that I wasn't a connoisseur of artsy things and I began to allow the enemy to make me feel a little threatened by Lori's gifts and awesome ability to be MASS creative! And I began to develop in my mind a thought that began establishing an identity on what I'm not rather than what I am... and that in turn began to establish my worth in the Lord based on a shadow rather than a reality. Where, if I would have recognized this in the beginning of this little journey I could have yielded my heart, I could have more smoothly and easily coupled my gifts and abilities with Lori's gifts and abilities and watched God do BIGGER and MORE amazing things by keeping my eyes ahead on the task of the Lord rather than my sister.

Sometimes, in groups, in the church as a whole, we secretly covet the abilities of others within the body and are threatened by the achievements of others and fail yield them before God for the betterment of the kingdom. So that we might "serve Him repentant and unencumbered" (Dick Shroeder). Living a threatened life is disheartening and not attractive to people around you!

It's like me saying I don't want to be in the shoulder, I want to be the eye, the eye is so much cooler everyone looks at it everyone wants to see it, no one wants to look at the shoulder or the knee. But really understanding the value of yourself before the King not before yourself or before others.... but before Papa. Your identity and character and value before God. And what a sweet spiritual cleansing and freedom that is resolved when your identity is placed before the Identity Maker than you making your own assumptions about what the Identity Maker wants or what He values. It's like your children, if you have more than one, you love them all... but you don't really love one more than another, you just love them differently. They are just different. Isn't God cool like that!!

For me, the last 6 months have been an incredibly spiritually cleansing time... where I am just daily surrendering my worth and my heart before God and saying...

"Search me and know me o God, Know my anxious thoughts and test me, o Papa, if there a anything in me that is displeasing to you, please reveal it and walk me through discarding it."

It's meant the world to a heart of surrender...

Questions to ask yourself:

-Who determines my worth?

-Do I have anything in my heart that is dirty that I should repent of?

-Do I wish that I would receive the praise that others are receiving?

-Am I jealous?

-How can I put myself at the feet of God daily and eventually get there with a clean heart?

-How can I be more like Him and less like me?

As for Lori, Lori... I repent, please forgive me for coveting your gifts and awesome abilities instead of rejoicing as wholeheartedly as I really felt. For creating a mental divide that would have kept me from fully partnering my skills with your skills to reach the kingdom and represent Jesus the way He deserves to be represented. You have an awesome sweet set of Creative skills going on and its a total blessing to me and to the kingdom that I get to be apart of your life and see them used for the kingdom. I repent for not realizing all these things earlier in our walk together. I've always valued your creative side, I didn't realize I was coveting it in a crippling fashion. Forgive me. And please, give me tips while I dabble in the random creative things that we can do great things for God together! Love you loads!

He's Big Enough

"My whole being, praise the Lord; all my being, praise his holy name. My whole being praise the Lord and do not forget all his kindnesses. He forgives sins and heals all my diseases. He saves my life from the grave and loads me with love and mercy. He satisfies me with good things and makes me young again, like the eagle..." Psalm 103: 1-5

Have you ever had those amazing moments where you were in the middle of a GOD THING and suddenly you find yourself invigorated and energetic like you've taken ten years off your life? Capable of doing anything! After all, He IS big enough to handle our heart and our lives! Amen!

Have you ever had those humdrum moments when you're at a restaurant and your less than thrilled at the taste of a steak that has just come out of the oven. Your hopes were high and the Chef's obviously were not. Next thing you know disappointment settles in and then you start thinking about the lame ending on the series finale of your favorite TV show. How your car just got a flat tire and how something recently broke at your house that needs repaired.

Sometimes, we as believers get going into the quick of life and begin to forget or set aside that the same God that is in the middle our our prayer times, our moments of healing, our ministry to others... our God of GOD THINGS is the same God who is actively involved in the little things of our life. When we're paying bills, when we're hungry, tired or just in need of company.

He is the Chef in the kitchen at an incredible restaurant. You have been seated at a table and every day you get to place an order. It might not always come out exactly as you've imagined but it's miraculous, incredible, praise worthy, sensational. Sometimes, you will find yourself ordering for other people because they just aren't sure what's good. But you'll know because you've tasted. Once they've tasted, the menu will be incredible to them and they will begin to see possibilities that you, yourself may have overlooked. Take time to thank the Chef today. Take time to order up the miraculous, He's big enough and He's invested in the outcome. Thank you Jesus for this incredible day.

A moment of Joy...

Today I walked out of a building on campus. I looked around and it was quiet, no one was around. It looked cloudy like rain would be coming at any given moment. An instrumental tune hit my head and I danced myself down the sidewalk to my car (I would have done that whether anyone was around or not).

I venture to say that everything that we feel emotionally could very well be a deep matter of perspective. It would have been easy to go, "oh great, it's hot and sticky and it's going to rain! Forget this, I'm going to bed!"

But, I think the beauty rests in the perspective. As I sit in my home tonight writing this, the lightening illuminates the sky outside and the trees bend at the fate of the falling rain. It is beautiful...

Rain is exceptional... although annoying long term... the short term brings a cleansing... growth... and renewal. I have met people across the United States and World who've found themselves in places where they have spent extensive amounts of time in prayer, asking that God would have it rain and renew the land. New Life.

I love the moments in life when things aren't necessarily great nor is anything wrong but you just feel a deep welling up of thankfulness and a heart to just bask in the glory of God. Where you can feel and just know that it is not only okay but great to just "be" with Jesus. Sometimes the "doing" can overtake the divine opportunities to just savor the Greatness of God... the rain if you will. :) Don't forget to take time today!